The Onion: Female Scientists Say Domestic Abuse Not Problem
On January - 10 - 2009
According to a team of female researchers who all recently sustained injuries due to various accidents, domestic abuse does not exist.
More coverage at: http://onion.com
Duration : 0:1:8
Talk soon,
Joe Beaven
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SECURE & CONFIDENTIAL
SLCThunk Says:
my ex was extremely …
my ex was extremely short and doorknobs kept hitting her shoulder. I saw a bruise and I got freaked out when I saw her bruise, I thought I had hit her or something and then repressed the memory!!!!
Then she told me it was the doorknob. I hope…
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
XIPM3 Says:
you should have …
you should have smacked that for real for saying that.
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
haatuan Says:
now if only we’re …
now if only we’re not so clumsy…hahahahah
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
nustada Says:
I know, I face that …
I know, I face that dellimma every day!
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
KCfan7706 Says:
hahahahaha i know, …
hahahahaha i know, the end was my favorite part-a kitten wins the honolulu cliff-diving championship!
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
autumnrider2 Says:
LAWL
LAWL
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
AnonNov Says:
So if a woman …
So if a woman attacks you with a knife and you can’t escape (say backed into a corner), you rather take the knife in your guts than hit her?
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
MrPlaid81 Says:
UP-setting!
UP-setting!
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
GoodbyeToBlueberyPie Says:
Sorry, i’m creeped …
A few years ago, two parents went out for dinner. A few hours later, the babysitter was calling to ask if she could cover up the clown statue in the kids’ room, the father said,”Take the kids and get out of the house. We’ll call the police, we don’t have a clown statue.” The “clown statue” is really a killer that escaped from jail. If you don’t post this letter on to 10 videos tonight, the clown will be in your bed at 3:00 am with a chainsaw in his hand
Sorry, i’m creeped out
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
tillerferny Says:
i lol’d my balls off
i lol’d my balls off
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
yootubematt Says:
Haha, my gf …
Haha, my gf sprained her ankle playing soccer. She was out for like 4 months and kept telling people that i pushed her down the stairs.
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
pfassad Says:
You messed up the …
You messed up the joke. It’s: What do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
sowknee Says:
it is on tv. i …
it is on tv. i forget where its available though
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
ChrisDaLunatic Says:
can it
can it
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
wolverine7277 Says:
i think onion might …
i think onion might have crossed the line on this dark humor
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
Anargam Says:
“A kitten wins the …
“A kitten wins the honolulu cliff-diving championship!”
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
koolzainski Says:
LOL… my GF …
LOL… my GF actually is clumsy, and says I beat her…
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
elanorepenn Says:
Oh man, this made …
Oh man, this made me laugh really hard.
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
shuckslbj Says:
You said it, …
You said it, gilli39. Almost couldn’t watch.
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
gilli39 Says:
Maaaan that was …
Maaaan that was some PITCH BLACK humor!!
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
burnzorz Says:
What do you tell a …
What do you tell a woman with a black eye? Nothing you haven’t already told her!
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
yvanoseki Says:
Man!
That’s bad …
Man!
That’s bad even for the Onion
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
davethedrummercancun Says:
ONN should be on TV …
ONN should be on TV like SNL and the always comical FOX NEWS!
Damn this was a funny bit with great delivery!!!!
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
hassiand Says:
and this is satire
and this is satire
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am
burnzorz Says:
is getting a black …
is getting a black eye a fetish or a mental problem? not everyone can agree with me on that. But I’ve seen cases of domestic abuse that were followed by rough consensual sex. Not a great environment for some of my younger friends, but it happens…and it’s not something we can all agree on.
Posted on January 10th, 2009 at 10:26 am